Endless Nights

A work in progress...

I treat my food like a woman. I complement her, call her flattering names, tell her she looks good, smells good, I tell her how much I want her, and I even tell her not to be afraid that I’m about to devour her like a wild animal. But it’s normal.

Only now when I see a beautiful woman, the first words I think of are “appetizing,” “tasty,” and “I want to eat you.”

BBMak broke up 11 years ago!!!???!!! I’ve been living a lie!

I really want an arch-nemesis…

@NeverRude007: “If you were on fire I’d put you out. And then I’d set you on fire again. That’s how you die.” - Matthew

@NeverRude007: “You guys are the biggest bullshitters. Bullshitting Wofford brothers…” - Mary Johnson

@NeverRude007: “Maybe it’s your soul you need to work on?” - Alexis

@NeverRude007: “You are the M. Night Shyamalan of life. You keep trying, but no…” - What my brother just said to me

@NeverRude007: “Goodnight, Fuckers.” - Jordo on 02/28/2014

@sassyjordo: “I hope Andrew’s thingy doesn’t turn green. Then he’ll start calling it the Hulk.” -Palmer “You wouldn’t like it when it’s angry!”-Kyle 😫

@sassyjordo: “Andrew’s got that serial killer vibe” - Alexis about @NeverRude007

@NeverRude007: “If there’s one thing you can say about Andrew Wofford, it’s that he’s full of shit!” - Jordo

@NeverRude007: “Literally a shit gargoyle. Don’t ask me how I came up with that. A level 4 shit monster.” - Palmer, adding to an already gross insult

@NeverRude007: “You’re correcting MY driving? Thank you for your concern, but I know what I’m doing.” - Matthew

@sassyjordo: “I’m so not a raper!” - Andrew @NeverRude007

@NeverRude007: “You are a life-ruiner. You actually ruin my life!” - Jordan, about our friendship

@NeverRude007: “You are such a shit! Not even a little shit; You are a giant shit!” - Jordan

@sassyjordo: “Hey, Andrew! It’s National Siblings Day! Fuck you.” - Kyle

@NeverRude007: “You look homeless.” - Dave, the editing teacher

@sassyjordo: “Sometimes in the heat of passion, I make wookie sounds. Also, I’m tall and hairy so it’s like you’re having sex with Chewbacca!” - Andrew

@NeverRude007: “You’re fucking satan!” - Kyle

@tfpk_for_life: “I’ve realized something. I think Andrew is legitimately retarded.”— Kyle

@sassyjordo: “Have you heard the really terrible thing that Andrew said recently?” “About women or black people?”

@sassyjordo: “I hope they leave a pair of scissors in you.” Kyle to Andrew

@sassyjordo: “I’m afraid of driving because there are worse drivers out there than Andrew.” “Are there?”

@NeverRude007: “You make me sad.” - Jordo said to me

@NeverRude007: “Andrew, you are a nigger in every way except for the athletic ability, the children and the arrest record.” - Shall remain nameless :)

@NeverRude007: > “A woman needed me.” - Self
> “That is impossible.” - Jordo

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I take a beating on Twitter :)

I FUCKING HATE WHEN PEOPLE POUR KETCHUP ALL OVER THE FRENCH FRIES INSTEAD OF A DESIGNATED CORNER AND THEY OFFER ME SOME LIKE NO FUCK YOU AND YOUR TAINTED FRENCH FRIES

(Source: oreoprince, via spookyjordo)

Those times when Tumblr is bad for you. And those same times when you hate social media.